Trolling for Cash

Some of you know that I am hoping to attend a graduate program at George Washington University next year (actually, class starts in a month). Because my husband and I just moved and haven't sold our house yet, I haven't started working, I already have nearly six figures in student loan debt, and the economy is generally just terrible, I am searching far and wide for any potential scholarship money I can find. I've heard reports that millions of dollars in scholarship money go unused every year, so I'm on a mission to find it. In my searches, I haven't found any scholarship money for political-science based part-time post-graduate work with an emphasis on animal welfare. However, I have found the following scholarships:



1) Scholarships for distant relatives of Annetje or Lambert Van Valkenberg -- I don't know who these people were, but apparently they have money to give away and variations in the spelling of Van Valkenberg are permissible;


2) The Arabian Horse Trust Scholarship -- you have to demonstrate an "interest" in Arabian horses (hmmm...define interest);



3) The Patrick Kerr Skateboard Scholarship -- not a chance!



4) The American Fire Sprinkler Association Scholarship (this one is one of my personal favorites) -- you can win a $3K grant for writing an essay about "successful sprinker operation" in your town or state;

5) The Duck Brand Duct Tape "Stuck at the Prom" Scholarship (also a favorite, but I'm sadly over 10 years too late on this one) -- a $3K grant available to the couple who makes the best prom outfit from Duct tape -- ouch!!;






6) National Marbles Tournament Scholarship -- marbles shooters (or "mibsters" as I have learned they are called) can apply for a scholarship as long as they have participated in a qualifying national tournament -- does anyone really play marbles anymore?;






7) The Tall Club Scholarship -- females over 5'10" are eligible for this one (clearly I'm not although I do have some Louboutin espadrilles that might hike me up that high) -- I must add that one of my roommates in college was "Miss Tall San Diego" -- she was 6'4";





8) The Columbia 300 Jon Jowdy Scholarship for active participants in bowling -- again, not a chance; and





9) Scholarship for people who are trained to use Morse Code -- no comment.




I did find a scholarship through a non-profit organization in Santa Monica called "Gaia" -- it's kind of a yoga-based spiritual group operating on the Ghandi-ism of being the change you wish to see in the world. I think I have a good shot at that. However, I also seem to recall a recent story about firefighters saving an old historic church here in New Orleans -- that Sprinkler Association one might be promising after all ...